see more huge dogs here

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sk-raveness:

drucila616:

How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces?These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place.ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?WITNESS: My name is Susan!_______________________________ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you sexually active?WITNESS: No, I just lie there.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?WITNESS: July 18th.ATTORNEY: What year?WITNESS: Every year._____________________________________ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember which.ATTORNEY: How long has he lived with you?WITNESS: Forty-five years._________________________________ATTORNEY: This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And in what ways does it affect your memory?WITNESS: I forget..ATTORNEY: You forget? Can you give us an example of something you forgot?___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Now doctor, isn’t it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn’t know about it until the next morning?WITNESS: Did you actually pass the bar exam?____________________________________ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?WITNESS: He’s 20, much like your IQ.___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Were you present when your picture was taken?WITNESS: Are you shitting me?_________________________________________ATTORNEY: So the date of conception (of the baby) was August 8th?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: And what were you doing at that time?WITNESS: Getting laid____________________________________________ATTORNEY: She had three children , right?WITNESS: Yes.ATTORNEY: How many were boys?WITNESS: None.ATTORNEY: Were there any girls?WITNESS: Your Honor, I think I need a different attorney. Can I get a new attorney?____________________________________________ATTORNEY: How was your first marriage terminated?WITNESS: By death..ATTORNEY: And by whose death was it terminated?WITNESS: Take a guess.___________________________________________ATTORNEY: Can you describe the individual?WITNESS: He was about medium height and had a beardATTORNEY: Was this a male or a female?WITNESS: Unless the Circus was in town I’m going with male._____________________________________ATTORNEY: Is your appearance here this morning pursuant to a deposition notice which I sent to your attorney?WITNESS: No, this is how I dress when I go to work.______________________________________ATTORNEY: Doctor , how many of your autopsies have you performed on dead people?WITNESS: All of them. The live ones put up too much of a fight._________________________________________ATTORNEY: ALL your responses MUST be oral, OK? What school did you go to?WITNESS: Oral…_________________________________________ATTORNEY: Do you recall the time that you examined the body?WITNESS: The autopsy started around 8:30 PMATTORNEY: And Mr. Denton was dead at the time?WITNESS: If not, he was by the time I finished.____________________________________________ATTORNEY: Are you qualified to give a urine sample?WITNESS: Are you qualified to ask that question?______________________________________And last:ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?WITNESS: No..ATTORNEY: So, then it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?WITNESS: No.ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.ATTORNEY: I see, but could the patient have still been alive, nevertheless?WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practicing law.

Reblogging because there are some sassy little shits out there.


kuribitah:

La cordillera de los Andes entre Chile y Argentina vista desde la Estación Espacial Internacional.


iflewbikes:

Paddy Power (a UK betting company) have chopped down a portion of the Brazilian rainforest as a publicity stunt for the World Cup.Here was their ‘apology.’
Fuck everything about football.



whatever-joey:

#YesAllWomen is trending on Twitter right now.

This is very important. 

Right now, men just need to shut up, read these and learn. We HAVE to do better.

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gaksdesigns: Cinemagraphs by Lucajsphotography

2,573 notes
lacunal:

bembali:

❁❁❁

this warms my heart



pr1nceshawn:

"Cynicism Illustrated"

Illustrator Eduardo Salles offers us beautiful slices of bitter cynicism through his minimalist posters…

Related: Imagine

16,318 notes

aosii:

rerylikes:

Dining Etiquette Around The World, an infographic by Restaurant Choice

via Feel Design

are these relevant or clichés to you?

this is very interesting and fascinating. i know from personal experience as a korean also not to stick my chopsticks upright in rice because it resembles incense at a funeral and is considered to be an omen/bad luck

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edgebug:

snivellussnep:

bethechangeyouwant:

little-audrey:

comfortspringstation:

Blow your MIND” Tomato Basil Pasta! - No Straining, just Stirring Throw it all in the pot, INCLUDING the uncooked Pasta, and cook! - Bring it to a boil, then reduce to a simmer. The starch leaches out of the pasta and makes a rich, warm sauce for the noodles. The other ingredients cook right along with the pasta Ingredients: 12 ounces pasta (Shown  Linguine) 1 can (15 ounces) diced tomatoes with liquid ( I used zesty red pepper flavor) 1 large sweet onion, cut in julienne strips 4 cloves garlic, thinly sliced 1/2 teaspoon red pepper flakes 2 teaspoons dried oregano leaves 2 large sprigs basil, chopped 4 1/2 cups vegetable broth (regular broth and NOT low sodium) 2 tablespoons extra virgin olive oil Optional Parmesan cheese for garnish Directions: Place pasta, tomatoes, onion, garlic, basil, in a large stock pot. Pour in vegetable broth. Sprinkle on top the pepper flakes and oregano. Drizzle top with oil. Cover pot and bring to a boil. Reduce to a low simmer and keep covered and cook for about 10 minutes, stirring every 2 minutes or so. Cook until almost all liquid has evaporated – I left about an inch of liquid in the bottom of the pot – but you can reduce as desired . Season to taste with salt and pepper , stirring pasta several times to distribute the liquid in the bottom of the pot. Serve garnished with Parmesan cheese if desired.
Source: https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=596567610375551&set=a.577027822329530.1073741826.100000669513646&type=1&theater

great Zeus’s beard this stuff is good. it’s also really easy and cheap and smells wonderful when it’s cooking. MAKE THE THING.

I’ve made this multiple times before and you should too

Oh good god.

i’ve made this but with water instead of veg broth and it’s freaking amazing
i didn’t use canned tomatoes either i used 12 ounces of cherry tomatoes, chopped in half
~delicious~



eschergirls:

nadadoll:

figure 1: head drawings by Andrew Loomis, 1956

figure 2: women’s head designs can be generated by the same methods, they don’t have to all look very nearly the same

Some food for thought for drawing women and avoiding drawing a single female face.  Too often artists seem to be afraid to give women big noses or lines or other distinguishing features, and we end up with the same face on all the characters.  I’ve been browsing a lot of genderswap art lately and I’ve noticed that when male characters with large noses, thin faces, wrinkles, or other features get genderswapped, they tend to end up with small noses, round faces, and no wrinkles, and they no longer look distinct (they also look much younger than the original).  So, just some references and a reminder that women’s faces have all sorts of different features, and you don’t need to just have small cute features with no wrinkles to have a character look female.

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